PPT Slide
Students’ theories generally idealistically described relationships on a surface level. They focused on physical attraction, dating, getting acquainted, and “falling in love.” The most highly supported scholarly theories of relationship development were Altman’s and Taylor’s social penetration theory and attraction theory. Self-disclosure or the exchange of increasingly personal information was a salient theme in students’ theories. Moreover, students’ theories concurred strongly with scholarly views of the fundamental importance of attraction as a common springboard for relationship development.
Underrepresented in students’ theories, however, were several of the processes and relational strengths thought by Personal Relationships scholars to build healthy long-term relationships. Few student theories included conflict as part of the course of a relationship (e.g., Gottman, 1979). When mentioned, conflict was viewed as a serious problem, rather than as a natural aspect of a healthy relationship. Similarly, although many college students included self-disclosure, such personal information sharing was mainly used as a “getting to know you” process rather than as ongoing relationship-oriented communication.