DO IT YOURSELF PROJECT
“You can do it in one day.”
Barry the Salesman
- I decide to put new flooring in my kitchen and breakfast area: 60
- Research flooring on Internet. All sites say how easy it is: 1 hour
- Visit various stores to select flooring: 2 days
- Order and pay for flooring: 5 minutes.
- Get a “One-day” estimate from Barry the
salesman on installation time required: 20 seconds
- Wait for flooring to arrive at store: 2 weeks
- Pick up flooring and bring home: 2 hours
- Unload flooring and stack in living room: 20 minutes
- Unpack flooring and lay it out to adjust to room temperature: 30
- Wait until I have some vacation days to install flooring: 45 days.
- Realize that I have to remove refrigerator and gas stove: 20 seconds
- Search for adjustable wrench to fit gas line: 10 minutes
- Search for second adjustable wrench to use with gas connection: 5
- Disconnect stove and refrigerator: 15 minutes
- Get hand truck from garage to move appliances: 5 minutes
- Discover flat tire on hand truck: 1 minute
- Take hand truck to tire repair center and wait for it to be fixed:
- Shop for a new hand truck because old one couldn't be fixed: 1.5
- Move stove and refrigerator to family room: 30 minutes.
- Remove table, chairs and other furniture: 20 minutes
- Remove old toe-rail molding: 15 minutes.
- Remove old wall base from under counters and cabinets: 15 minutes
- Realize I need new wall base: 30 seconds
- Notice that baseboard and walls need painting before doing floor:
- Search for new paint to match existing paint: 1 hour.
- Paint wall, baseboard and window trim: half day
- Cleanup from painting: 30 minutes
- Remove old transition strip between carpet and flooring: 5 minutes
- Decide I need new transition strip: 1 minute
- Notice that I need to vacuum and wash existing floor: 1 minute
- Vacuum and wash existing floor: 20 minutes
- Cut and put down foam underlay for new flooring: 45 minutes
- Cut and put down the new flooring: 1 day (Barry
- Drive to Lowe's for new toe-rail molding, floor base and transition
strip: 1 hour.
- Measure and cut toe-rail: 20 minutes
- Make serious error in measuring and cutting toe-rail: 1 minute
- Drive back to Lowe's and buy more toe-rail: 1 hour.
- Cut and paint all toe-rail molding: 1 hour
- Cleanup from painting: 15 minutes
- Vacuum up sawdust: 5 minutes
- Realize I need plumbing thread sealer for gas line: 1 minute
- Drive to Lowe's to get plumbing thread sealer: 1 hour
- Reinstall stove: 15 minutes
- Discover the new transition strip is not long enough: 30 seconds.
- Back to Lowe's for longer strip and return short one: 1 hour
- Find that new floor base strip is too wide: 1 minute
- Cut all floor base to right width: 30 minutes
- Scrape and clean surface where floor base attaches: 20 minutes
- Trim, cut to fit, and install floor base: 45 minutes
- Paint second coat on all toe-rail molding: 30 minutes
- Cleanup from painting: 15 minutes
- Decide to paint metal floor registers to match new floor: 1 minute
- Use steel brush on floor registers to prepare them for painting:
- Back to Lowe's to find paint for registers: 1 hour
- Paint registers: 10 minutes
- Wait one hour for paint to dry and paint second coat: 10 minutes
- Install toe-rail with finishing nails: 30 minutes
- Split a piece of toe-rail because I didn't pre-drill holes: 3 seconds
- Go to Home Depot for scrap piece of toe-rail: 40 minutes
- Cut and paint new section of toe-rail: 10 minutes
- Wait one hour for paint to dry and repaint: 5 minutes
- Clean paintbrush: 5 minutes
- Install new piece of toe-rail after paint dries: 5 minutes
- Use nail punch to set all toe-rail nails: 15 minutes
- Fill all nail set holes with spackling: 10 minutes
- Touch-up all nail holes with paint after spackle dried: 10 minutes
- Clean up after painting: 10 minutes
- Move refrigerator back into kitchen using hand truck: 10 minutes
- Refrigerator no longer fit under cabinet because floor is higher.
- Empty refrigerator, lay it on its back, remove rollers from bottom:
- Refrigerator still too tall. Empty wall cabinet and remove from wall:
- Position refrigerator and reinstall cabinets higher: 20 minutes
- Restock refrigerator and cabinets: 15 minutes
- Put away all tools: 15 minutes.
- Vacuum kitchen and family room: 10 minutes
- Clean up basement workshop of all sawdust from cutting flooring:
- Soak sore knees and back muscles in hot tub after being on the floor
for several days: 40 minutes.
- Admire work: 5 minutes
- Realize dishwasher can never be removed without removing
flooring or counter top: 1 minute
- Go find Barry and kill him: Life